And now we begin the hard part......

This picture is one Tim took of one of our kids facing the homemade snow jump without fear....but the next picture he took was of her falling off the crazy carpet face first! Cool. I think it illustrates how I'm feeling...."whoa".

Did you ever have to sell girls scout cookies or candy bars in school? Or maybe you had to get people to sign a petition or vote for something.

I did. I hated it. The feeling of having to sell something to someone....to explain to them why YOUR cause was important....the fear of rejection...of inconveniencing them....I knew the chocolate was stale and the cookies, well....they were good. But I hated selling. Still do.

My dad always ended up buying the whole box of chocolate or cookies....he knew the pain of having to go door to door just hoping the person on the other side of the portal wasn't rolling their eyes at another kid selling junk food. Thanks, Dad.

But now, here I am, preparing to make the move of a lifetime and thinking about the "upfront" costs makes my mind spin. I'm that shy, scared little girl fearing rejection once again. We have to raise $2000.00 for airfare, over $1000.00 for our visas and immunizations, $4250.00 per semester for tuition, an additional $1000.00/month for rent, food, water, etc. On top of that, we cannot work in the Philippines! Mmmm. Something's not adding up, B.

Then I think, "What are you doing, Bethany? Are you nuts!? This is the start of financial insecurity for life....your well-being dependent on the generosity of others!" I have to give it over to God once more. Yeah, I'm pretty nuts.

The cry of my heart and the desire God's placed in Tim and I is to serve the poor without having to fear whether we can continue to live in their land.....to immerse ourselves in their culture and bless them in the name of Jesus....to show them that Christ's love knows no boundaries....not even the earthly territorial boundaries we have set up.

Once I give Him these concerns....He always shows up in one way or another. A day or two ago, Tim and I were writing our letter of intent for enrollment for the school and we were to send a chunk of moola by April 1st, 2007 to hold our place and you know what happened?
That chunk of moola was there....sitting in our account.....all ready to go and instead of sending the moola by April 1st, we sent it this morning! Praise God! It was like God quietly saying, "Bethany, I got your back...I've called you and when I guide, I provide".

And then Naomi and I are hosting 4 Christmas English High Teas of 12 women each to raise awareness and money towards the midwifery ministry and you know what? People actually want to come! They are signing up! Isn't that crazy!? Some of them are complete strangers, too! We haven't had to go door to door. We just have to knock and find rest at God's door and He does the rest. Whew.

This is really happening. I am humbled and I am choosing to trust.
Keep those comments coming! :)