GUARDING FRISBEES.....or maybe my heart?

In this picture, I am guarding a frisbee...yes, a frisbee...my friend was trying to take it from me and toss it in the airport. I was somewhat concerned about the comings and goings of others, so I took it and guarded it.....close to my heart.
When I saw this picture, it reminded me of the wayI sometimes guard my heart from being hurt. The expression on my face is one I am not particularly proud of....it's not very flattering and yet, there are times when I respond to others with that same look like, "Get out of my face before I bite your head off!!" (sorry to all of those out there who have been in that situation with me!). But what does GOD say about guarding our hearts and what does that look like?
I've decided to look into that.......this is posting #1:
My first passage of the WORD is from Proverbs given the fact that "guard your heart" is a command in chapter 4.....
This chapter is pretty amazing....it talks about desiring and gaining wisdom above all earthly gains and then guarding it as it dwells in our heart. It brings us life. A few verses got me REALLY thinking....take a look: (NIV)
"Listen, my sons, to a father's instruction; pay attention and gain understanding.
I give you sound learning, so do not forsake my teaching.
When I was a boy in my father's house, still tender, and an only child of my mother,
he taught me and said,"Lay hold of my words with all your heart; keep my commands and you will live. Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or swerve from them. Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Esteem her, and she will exalt you; embrace her, and she will honor you.
She will set a garland of grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendor."
Listen, my son, accept what I say, and the years of your life will be many.
I guide you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths.
When you walk, your steps will not be hampered; when you run, you will not stumble.
Hold on to instruction, do not let it go; guard it well, for it is your life.
Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evil men.
Avoid it, do not travel on it; turn from it and go on your way.
For they cannot sleep till they do evil; they are robbed of slumber till they make someone fall.
They eat the bread of wickedness and drink the wine of violence. The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever brighter till the full light of day. But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know what makes them stumble. My son, pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words.
Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body. Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you. Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil."
What strikes me about this is that long before we are told to "guard our heart", we are to "lay hold of the WORD" with all our heart. We guard our heart because the precious WORD, instruction, wisdom and understanding of God dwell there.....then it's almost as if we are given instruction on how to guard it....by "putting away perversity" and "corrupt talk", by fixing our eyes straight ahead and keeping our foot out of evil. Mmmmm. We aren't even to place a foot on the path of evil.....not even a toe! So many times I entertain the idea that I can dance on the line between the path of righteousness and the path of sin. It's like the imaginary line that kids make in the back seat of the car....we try to come so close to it without putting a finger over it just to annoy the other person. We do that with God, too.....how close am I to the line that paves the way to death. Awfully close too often. Sometimes I pray that God would break my legs if HE must, just to keep me close to Him....that's easier than having to choose to walk the narrow path paved with sorrow and ending in pure joy. Do I guard my heart from the path of sin? How close do I live to the border of mediocrity?Mmmmm. I can only repent and ask for HIS wisdom, understanding, and the strength to guard my heart. Thanks for reading.....more to come!

Water under the bridge.....

I am often humbled and flabberghasted by the forgiveness of the Lord. It's frightening to realize that no matter what I do, the Lord still sees me as blameless....I ask Him to forgive me and give me the courage and strength to stop certain behaviours and He provides. Who can do this besides the Lord? Who can forgive and forget the things that have hurt and offended? I certainly struggle with this. I am in awe of His grace. Psalm 130:3-5 (NIV) says,
"If You, O LORD, kept a record of sins,
O Lord, who could stand?
But with You there is forgiveness;
therefore You are feared.
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in His Word I put my hope."
Perhaps when King David was writing this, he was not just stating the facts, but was having trouble really allowing it to penetrate his soul.....maybe that's why he was 'waiting' for the Lord....I mean, really, the statement that the Lord keeps no record of wrongs and gives forgiveness instead of judgement is pretty intense. I know my "humanness" seeks justice and has trouble operating in a state of grace. Most of the time I would prefer for God to strike me down with a lightening bolt or something when I do wrong because at least then I could FEEL like I'd been punished. I desire justice and hate my sin......and yet, God chooses to give me mercy....and where would I be without it? That's when I wait...wait for Him and hope in His word .....and that's when He comes....gently reminding me that my true identity is "beloved" covered in the cleansing freedom of Jesus' blood shed for me. He picks me up and tells me that His strength will pour into me so that my sin cannot control me. And then I sin again.....and He does it again.....and I sin again....and He cleanses me again. What grace. I wish I had that much grace for myself. Mmmmm. God is sooooo good.

Ahhhh, God's best is ALWAYS best!

So I have the best husband. No really, I do! I was thinking about this passage as I came across it today......
1 Peter 3:7 (The Message)
"The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God's grace, you're equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don't run aground."
And I thought.....wow! I should ask my husband to pray more! He's like the best husband ever.....who knows what blessings lay waiting for us in God's storehouse if Tim would ask more!? In all seriousness, though...Tim really blesses me. One of the dearest things he has shared with me recently is that the first thing he does when he wakes up in the morning is pray and ask the Lord to show him what he can do to bless his wife today. Wow.
What's even more amazing about this is that he really does bless me daily! I am humbled.
It's not that we don't have any problems or that we never argue, but over the last four years of marriage, he has made it his mission to find out how to bless me and I have made it mine to honor him. It makes the arguments less heated, the problems less chaotic and gives our home a true peace that nothing material can fabricate. It's God.
What I really love about this 1 Peter passage is that he says to treat 'your' wife as 'your' equal because she equally shares in the new life of God's grace. This is an area that we need growth in, but have learned so much about. One of the things that blesses me the most about Tim's way of honoring me is that he is not afraid to ask me what I think. Now, it used to be that he would hear what I thought regardless of whether he wanted to hear it or not! But God has really worked on me about shutting up and really listening to him before making a comment or judgement. In return, he always asks and that just makes me burst with security and the feeling of being cherished....to know that he actually wants to know my opinion! Ahhh.
I could go on and on about all this, but really what it comes down to is when Tim looks to God to 'figure out' his wife.....it works and creates a cohesive partnership where I feel secure in his love and loyalty to submit fully to what he sees as God's best. Afterall, before we got engaged, he told me that HE was God's best for me and I believed him and.......he was right!

Serving a God who sees....

My mom sent me this picture a while ago and I must say I have come back to it again and again to marvel at it's possible significance. The eye of God maybe?
We have somewhat finished Joseph's story.....certainly there are lessons and details I have left out, but you can study and find those diamonds on your own....send me a thought or two if you do!! I think it's time for me to move on to something new now......
Isn't it nice to know that we serve a God who never sleeps and always sees? In our children's group home, there are certain times when we have to keep the 'baby monitor' on in our bedroom at night so if the children are up to no good, we can hear just what's going on and stop a potentially dangerous situation. Just last night we had to sleep with the monitor on and I remember thinking, "I'm not going to get much sleep tonight!" and "What if I don't hear anything because I am too deep in sleep!?" (My husband is a VERY heavy sleeper, so it's usually up to me to get up) I was slightly concerned....and really nothing worth noting happened through the night. I slept okay, too. ;p
But it made me so grateful that I serve a God who never tires so that He must sleep...His eyes are never shut. He sees everything (even the things I don't want Him to see!!!). Psalm 121 beautifully shares with us that when God's on watch, we have nothing to worry about....
" I lift up my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip—
He who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, He who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.
The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
The LORD will keep you from all harm— He will watch over your life;
the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore." (NIV)
Wow. What an incredible blessing. He is always listening, He is always 'with-it' and alert.....I can trust Him. He never falters. To that I give a very teary 'thank you, Lord!'

From a Father to a Son (a visit to my newborn nephew's house)

We're still on topic with Joseph, but I thought I'd post the latest picture of my nephew, Benjamin. He's a handsome, manly one, eh? It may be the last picture I post, too, as I don't want to invade my brother and sister-in-law's privacy by plastering their kids over the internet no matter how proud an Aunt I am! He's precious, eh? Only a couple of days old and God is already moving in his life. My brother and sister-in-law are amazing parents and the biggest reason for this is their complete dependence on God to raise their kids.
As I was singing "The B-I-B-L-E" with my neice, Grace, I was overwhelmed with joy to know that she is being taught and is truly learning the most important things in life. I played 'house' with her this week and "Grandma Con" got sick in the play house and I asked her what we should do for her and her immediate reaction was to "pray for Grandma Con" and in her 2-year-old voice, she said "In Jesus Name, Amen". I know Jesus knew what she meant. What a joy for Benjamin to get to grow up in a family that prays for him, that teaches him the most important lifeline....a relationship with Jesus. I was honored to be with them this week.
How does this apply to Joseph? Well, without Jacob's deep faith in God and the promises He had given him, Joseph would not have been able to stand when he entered his greatest suffering. As parents, Aunts, or caregivers of any sort, it is our responsibility to prepare our kids for suffering. Not in the sense of purposely giving it to them (as the Bible says to not provoke your children to wrath! My dad and I always laughed about that!), but in the sense of giving them the tools to deal with all the "unexpecteds" of life.
No doubt Jacob shared his dreams and visions from God to his sons and notice the only one who seemed to truly listen was his son, Joseph. BUT, here's where things get interesting.
After Jacob and his sons came to Egypt to live near Joseph, Jacob was nearing death. He called for his sons to come to him so that he could bless them. What is striking about these blessings is that not all of them are blessings. In fact many of them were disheartening! Genesis 49 shares each brother's individual encounter with their father as he lay dying......the passage is much too long for me to repeat here, but you might want to read it...it's pretty amazing.
What I find interesting is that the 'blessings' Jacob gave to his sons came from divine knowledge from God. You know why I know this....well, if you follow each son's progeny, you can find that somewhere, somehow, the blessings Jacob gave came true! Maybe I'll discuss that further in another post, as it is quite lengthy and has lots of Scripture references! But I think Jacob teaches us a very valid lesson! There's power in the blessing of a God-fearing father! I know that not all fathers have it together and not everything they say comes out as blessing, but as I looked at my brother with his newborn Benjamin, I could not help but be humbled by the incredible gift and responsibility my brother has to speak blessing over his son. It is a responsibility that all of us have as caregivers....when we ask our Heavenly Father for His wisdom and His blessing, He gives us the words to speak out to our children....words of their destiny, acceptance, and calling. Let us not take our words lightly as they do have power. I have no doubt that my brother will lovingly seek God for Benjamin's best and speak those blessings over him! How fun! Thanks for all the comments...more to come! ;p

Ever feel stuck like a duct duck? (Joseph continued)

I'm writing from my parent's house in Oregon this week, so things may appear disjointed a bit! We have been so enjoyed visiting my brother and sister-in-law this week as we are celebrating the birth of their son, Ben! VERY EXCiTING! So we continue on with the conclusion of the story of Joseph....I have been learning so much from this study and I hope you have been, too. Please continue to comment as I am encouraged and learn more from others!
Joseph has now revealed himself to his brothers and has begun to prepare a place in Egypt for his extended family. I am amazed at the parallels between the life of Jesus and our buddy Joseph. It is like an Old Testament example of Christ. Although it is not nearly as meaningful and life-changing as the life of Christ...it certainly shows us that God REALLY wants us to know that with Him, all things are possible and He REALLY does have our best interests at heart! Let's focus on those parallels, shall we? I am just recapping previous posts, so if you want Scripture references just refer to the story references below. Okay...
Joseph's very own brothers rejected him ......Jesus was denied by his followers (by Peter) and Crucified by his own people (the Jews). Joseph was sold into slavery for 20 sheckels of silver....Jesus was given over to the Roman guard by Judas for 30 sheckels of silver (the price of a slave). Joseph suffered greatly and unjustly at the hands of those who hated him....Jesus suffered immensely being beaten and crucified for no crime. Joseph had to suffer so that he could save many lives in Egypt during the famine, inluding his own family....Jesus had to die so that we could be forgiven.........reconciled with God. Joseph had to test his brothers to see if their hearts had changed before God. Jesus tests us today! Joseph was exalted to a place of authority when he least expected it....Jesus rose again after three days in a tomb to be exalted to the right hand of the throne of God. Joseph prepared a place for his family in Egypt...Jesus is preparing a place for His family, too! Right now as we read! Joseph forgave his brothers when they repented and told them not to be angry at themselves....Jesus has forgiven all of us and desires for us to walk in a place of confidence before His throne because He sees us as pure children. We have been washed by His cleansing blood.
Lots of parallels! What does this mean for us? Well, Joseph was not this amazing person, but he was given the grace of God to act righteously in the face of injustice and the temptation of sin. God is so faithful. Joseph identified with Christ and is an example for us as how to endure some of life's greatest challenges. I have an area of my life that has caused some intense pain and suffering....But I am trying to always remember the promises of God! He will always fulfill them! How are you identifying with Christ lately? And what is your reaction? I'll get real honest right now....see if anyone is really reading this blog.....God has given me a dream and a vision for my husband and I. We know God is going to give us children one day. We have been 'kinda' trying for a baby for the last 4 years or so. Health issues have made things more difficult and seemingly impossible for our dream and the vision the Lord has given us to come true. And every month, my cycle (the girly one) is late or doesn't arrive at all leaving me wondering if I need to take a pregnancy test just to make sure. And every month the negative sign shows up or 'maybe' the period comes. Lately, everyone I know, including family members, have been pregnant....and before each one found out, the Lord told me a few days before it was announced. Seriously! The Lord would show me who'd be pregnant and the following week or sometimes the following day, the person would announce their pregnancy! What was God doing? And now the babies are coming and I am filled with such joy and excitement as I am able to hold them and whisper 'Jesus loves you' into their little bitty ears. And such a deep sorrow fills the very core of my being at the very same time.
People who know about the pain encourage to continue to believe that it will happen someday, but it brings little comfort and sometimes even makes me feel stupid of guilty for even giving the impression that I need to be comforted. I don't like people feeling sorry for me and I rehearse all the Bible verses about the joy of the barren woman and the amazing stories about the Lord opening the womb of so many women and it just fills me with more pain and very little comfort. BUT GOD! I know His plans are higher than mine and He knows what He is doing. Therefore, I press on and ask Him how I can be a blessing and not fall into self-pity and He says to serve. That's when I try to serve the very ones that bring on the most pain.....the pregnant women who complain about every pain and ache they get. Little do they know that I have felt those same pains without any reward following them...but after 9 months, they have child. But, just like Joseph, I see my circumstance as unjust....as emotional sufferiong and I can view it as identifying with Christ and learn all I can from the process and jouney I am on, or I can separate myself from all my pregnant friends and wallow in pity. Mmmmm. It is a daily sacrifice and every time my period comes, for one whole day my hearts feels so much pain it just might burst...like the death of a dream, but His mercies are new every morning and I ask Him once again for hope and the faith to believe His promise. He is so faithful! Stay tuned!
PS. I LOVED HOLDING MY NEPHEW THIS WEEK!

IT'S A BOY!!!!! (I'm an Aunt again!)

Just wanted to announce the birth of my nephew, Benjamin Andrew, born May 12 at 11:45 am! My sister-in-law and Benjamin are doing fantastic and God is sooo faithful! My brother is a proud father of TWO kids now! Can't wait to see da baby! (I'm his favorite Aunt!;p)
More posts on Joseph to come! Stay tuned!!

TA - DA! IT'S ME! (Joseph continued!)

Cool picture, eh!? Don't know where I got it, but it reminded me that some things are not at all what they appear to be and that can be a GOOD thing! Ever misjudge a person? I have....and it wound up affecting me the way this iceberg would affect the Titanic!
It can represent something very significant in Genesis 45, too! In our story, Judah had just asked the 'Egyptian' (Joseph) for mercy so that he could take the place of his brother, Benji, who was going to have to be Joseph's servant for 'stealing' a silver cup from Joseph's house. (love those run on sentences!) Like last entry... confession and repentence lead to reconciliation! And after Judah confessed and repented, it was time for Joseph to reveal his true HEBREW identity and be reconciled to his brothers!
The hearts of Joseph's brothers had been laid bare through time and testing. They had shown how 13 years had changed them from selfish, self-serving boys to selfless, considerate men. Cool.
Genesis 45 shares that Joseph "could no longer contain himself in front of his attendants and he cried out, 'Have everyone leave my presence!' and he was all alone with his brothers". Can you just imagine the emotion of the room!? Joseph nearly wetting his pants with excitement and joy!! Joseph then says, "I am Joseph!! Is my father still living?" (vs. 3) And you know what the brothers did!? They said nothing, too terrified to speak! I love that! Joseph's joyful weeping was so loud that the Bible says that the Egyptians heard him and Pharoah's entire household heard about it! (I wonder if it was a wail or a laughter weep....or maybe it was a grunting one....I would've loved to have heard it!) It gets better!
He says (noticing their bit of trembling...perhaps THEY wet themselves!), "Come close to me....I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! And now do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you!" (read the rest of that passage...it's great!) What incredible insight Joseph was given directly from God to know exactly how to communicate to his brothers that they had just been a part of God's amazing plan to preserve their lives by using the very life they sought to destry! Wow....God's clever! He has such an amazing way of humbling us!
Joseph gives the run-down of the last couple of years and shares that the famine was going to last a few more years. He then explains that God had been giving him favor with Pharoah and his entire household so that he could move their family into Egypt to be cared for properly during this difficult time. Once again, Joseph gave all the credit to God. He recognized that God had all this planned so that his family's household would not become destitute. Whoa! I wonder what his brothers were thinking right about then!
From there, the brothers were sent home to share the news with their father, Jacob. He was stunned and overjoyed, to say the least, and made preparations to head to Egypt. (read 'bout that in Genesis 46) When Pharoah heard what was going on in Joseph's place, he and his officials were pleased! Pharoah went to Joseph and said, " "Tell your brothers, 'Do this: Load your animals and return to the land of Canaan, and bring your father and your families back to me. I will give you the best of the land of Egypt and you can enjoy the fat of the land.'
"You are also directed to tell them, 'Do this: Take some carts from Egypt for your children and your wives, and get your father and come. Never mind about your belongings, because the best of all Egypt will be yours.' " (Genesis 45:18-20). WHOOOOPEEEE! No doubt that excited the little Hebrew boy from Canaan who was once stuck in slavery, imprisoned, reconciled and exalted! DUDE! The chapter concludes with Joseph's family being given mass quantities of money, food, clothing, and other gifts including the choicest land in all of Egypt for them to settle on. (More to come on that.)
Ya know, when we are obedient in the midst of trial and tribulation, God always has our back. He always has something better for us around the bend. If at any point, Joseph had decided, "Nah, this whole God thing just isn't working! I'm in too much despair and pain"....he could've missed the joy and provision of God's sweet reconciliationand the riches of His glory! If he had given credit to himself every time he was exalted in front of Pharoah instead of giving all credit to God, Joseph could've missed out in the realization that his suffering was not his fault or a result of his works, but out of God's very best plan to set him up for the promised land. (more on that later). Ya know, anytime we identify with Christ (that is, suffer unjustly and/or for righteousness' sake), we share in His sufferings and when we righteously share in His sufferings, we also share in His fruitfulness....His blessing. That's what He promises us! (Romans 8:17). He's not the cosmic killjoy that so many people think of Him as....His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts! (Isaiah 55:9) Isn't that comforting! He's smarter than us and sees the whole big picture. He's sees it and with excitement and joy, includes us in it. He likes us that much! What a responsibility we have! And just think....it took 13 years for Joseph and his brothers to really get this! We have the Bible! Maybe it won't take us that long!.....we are a work in progress......humbling.....
Stay tuned!

Surprise beauty in midst of testing (Joseph continued)

Did you have a craving for lamb after the last post? This portion of the story has little to do with food.
Tim took this picture awhile back and I liked it then, and I like it even more now. It reminds me that God brings out some of the greatest beauty when old things die. I'm not talking people....plants! Ya know, in order for new growth and flowering to occur, a plant must endure the harshness of winter and the death of most of its bounty. It IS a lot like what we go through in times of trial and testing. And from here we continue our story of Joseph.
The feast has finished and Joseph has made it clear to the sons of Jacob that he is pleased they have followed through with their promise of bringing Benji to Egypt. Joseph can hardly contain his emotion, but still manages to withhold his true identity from his brothers.
Once again Joseph tests his brothers to see if they are truly protectors of each other or if they operate in jealously and rage with one another. Genesis 44 reveals Joseph's plan. He tells his steward to place a silver cup (a 'divining cup') in the grain sack of Benji. The steward does as he is told and the brothers take off towards Canaan.....back home to report to their father of their gracious host and the favor of God. But ooops, Joseph's steward goes after the men and accuses them of stealing the cup and betraying the good will of their Egyptian host. Of course the boys deny the whole thing (and they WERE telling the truth....LIFE IS NOT FAIR!) and promise that 'if any one of (your) servants is found to have it, he will die and the rest of us will become my lord's slaves' (Genesis 44:9). Uh-oh!
The steward agreed to the proposal and each one of the men lowered their bags for the steward to take a look. No doubt they were filled with confidence that the steward wouldn't find anything and then the guillotine fell...CHOP! Benjamin's sack carried the silver cup of DOOM!!! When the brothers saw this, they fell to the ground and ripped off all their clothes!! I am sure they solemnly packed their donkeys and returned to Egypt 'cuz now they were in REALLY big trouble.
But this is what's interesting....not one of the brothers turned and scowled or pointed the finger at Benji.....not one brother argued with accusations. Mmmmm. Certainly not what I would have done!
So they appear before Joseph once again and throw themselves on the ground pleading "What can we say to my lord?".... in other words, "we suck and we have no clue as to how this happened! It must be an act of God to uncover our guilt". They resort to the fact that they are now all slaves and humbly pledge themselves to Joseph. But Joseph knew exactly what to say and remarks that he cannot take them ALL as slaves....only the one who took the cup...the youngest...the pride and joy of Jacob....the one that Jacob said he could not lose...the one that Judah said he'd protect from anything that would come to harm him........oh poor wee Benji. He tells them to go back to their father in peace. Yeah, right. Some peace that'll be!!
But this is where the beauty comes up from the 'ashes'. Where the 'old man' dies and a 'new man' springs forth....beautiful. This is where the rubber met the road and the true heart of the brothers came out. And this is where Joseph gets all his reservations and questions answered. Out steps Judah. You gotta read this guy's speech to Joseph! It's Genesis 44:18 and on. He starts out asking to speak to Joseph and say a word or two. He shares with Joseph that they have been truthful to the Egyptian throughout their journey....that their father's only request in their journey to Egypt was that his youngest son would return home to him.....that he mourned when his favorite son (Joseph) died and could not bear seeing his last and one and only son from his beloved wife, Rachel, dead. He shared that his father would die at the news of Benji living the life of a slave and that if losing Joseph was harsh, this would surely put him beyond misery. Judah told Joseph that he had guaranteed the safe delivery of Benji to his father and committed himself to his safe return. Therefore, HE would take the place of Benji and become Joseph's slave.....he pleaded this to Joseph.....
So we'll stop there.....just to keep you on the edge of your seat.....DON'T READ AHEAD! That's cheating! But I am sure you know what will happen. But let's take a look at what has just happened, shall we?
We have covered something very important....Judah took full responsibility and became the brothers' spokeman.....he acknowledged that this was God uncovering their sins in order that they confess and repent....he refused to leave the favored Benji.....and he sacrificed his life so that his father would not lose another one of Rachel's sons. WHOA! What a change! He basically paved the road to reconciliation! It comes with confession, then repentence, and finally there is reconciliation. This is what Joseph needed to see to be confident his brothers had really changed. I think we go through times in our lives where we have to be reconciled to God and other people over and over again. It isn't a one-time event. It comes with confessing our sins one to another (I think that's a scripture in the Bible ;p), allowing God to change our hearts toward each other or the situation through repentence and then the joy of reconciliation and peace overwhelm our spirits. Cool. Can't wait to see how things get worked out with these guys! But for now, who do I need to be reconciled to? Mmmm. Stay tuned!

THE FEAST! (Joseph continued)

I like the taste of lamb....especially when it's cooked Greek style! Tim took this picture of my lamb...works good with today's post because Joseph's preparing some tasty Egyptian lamb for a feast!! Why, you ask?! Well, in continuing with our story about Joseph (read the entries prior to this one if you're lost...I almost got lost in trying to write this!! ;p), Genesis 43 tells us that Joseph's brothers took Benjamin to Egypt along with the double portion of silver they owed for grain and some tasty treats to appease the guard at the storehouse as their father, Jacob had commanded. They still don't know that the guard is their very own brother, Joseph.
They presented themselves, along with Benjamin, to Joseph. Without missing a beat, Joseph commands his men to take the brothers to his house, slaughter an animal and prepare a dinner! Well, I'd say the brothers are REALLY astonished by now! But instead of the brothers taking advantage of the sudden good fortune, the brothers sense some conviction and say to Joseph's steward, (Bethany paraphrased) "Umm, so we came down a little bit ago and bought some food, but when we headed home we found our dough returned in our sacks....we didn't do it, so uh, we brought it back as well as some dough for more grain....uh, sorry?" And the steward (who must have been a man of God!) says, "Hey, it's cool guys! No need to fear! Your God, you know...the God of your father...He's given you guys some treasure in your sacks! I got your money." And then he brings Simeon out to them! Talk about some serious grace going on! I am sure by this point they are scratching their heads and thinking they've gone MAD! It gets better.....
The steward of Joseph's house washes their feet and provides fodder for their donkeys. When Joseph came home, the brothers presented him with their gifts (the nuts and stuff...I hope they were candied almonds...I like those). Once again, the brothers bowed low to the ground in respect for this crazy Egyptian who was treating them kindly. (Gen 43:26) Joseph asks how they're doing and if Jacob is still living. They bow again and reply that all is well with his servant, Jacob! His SERVANT!....reminds me of a dream Joseph had..... ;)
So then he turns to Benjamin (let's call him Benji now) and confirms that this is the brother he's asked them to bring....the youngest brother. He says to Benji "God be gracious to you, my son!". And then you know what Joseph does!? He races out of the room, too moved and emotional to contain himself any further! I'm surprised he lasted THAT long! He washes his face and returns announcing it's time for some grub. And according to that day, Egyptians and Hebrews were not to eat together because Hebrews were detestable to them, so Joseph ate in one room and the brothers in another.
I love this part.....So when the brothers were seated, the steward seated them according to their ages from the firstborn to the youngest! The boys were entirely beside themselves in astonishment! How could this crazy Egyptian know their order of birth!? They must've been wondering what was going on!
The food was served and Benji received five times the food the other brothers received! We'll stop there....No doubt this was the best meal the boys had in a long time! I'm sure Joseph was antsy in his pantsies trying to stay quiet about his identity! He just was not sure that the brothers were really different from who they were 13 years ago. He just needed to know if they had become men of integrity and honor. Giving Benji more food than the rest was just another way of testing the boys to see if they would mumble and scowl in jealousy at the youngest, priviliged member of their family. He needed to know that they loved Benji despite his present favoritism and perhaps even have some regrets about their treatment of Joseph 13 years prior.
It's fascinating to me that God cared enough for Joseph to put the brothers into a situation time and time again where they had to BOW to Joseph, just like in the dreams God had given him. And that God cared enough for the brothers that He consistently placed them in situations where they were taken care of, but also humbled. What a caring God we serve! He always does what He promises and does it with the greatest amount of grace, glory, and provision. He always does more than we can ask or think and without our permission or preference of timing....but it's because He loves us....a lot.
Ya know, if Joseph had been set free from slavery a couple years into his stay in Egypt, he probably would have gone back to the land of Canaan and to his father's house. Then the nation of Israel (Jacob's family) would have died in the famine and we wouldn't have the Israel we have today! Jesus would not have been a Hebrew! Whoa! That's heavy stuff! So, God loved US enough to allow Joseph to go through all that suffering so that he would stay in Egypt, be reconciled to his family, and prepare a place for them in Egypt to survive the famine and become a prosperous nation...so......what is God having us do that may feel uncomfortable for the time being because He has a greater purpose??........Stay tuned! It's not over, yet!!! (and thanks for the comments!)

Thanks for all the feedback! (Joseph cont.)

I was so surprised and blessed with all the comments in the last post! Maybe I should whine more often! ;P Just kidding. But really, it was so good to get some comments and oddly enough, the comments were regarding the picture moreso than the writing....so I thought I'd give you the other one I did for my niece! Yes, her name is Grace and this pic is very appropriate for our next portion of the Joseph story! Good stuff. AND, thanks, mom, for finally commenting on the blog...you CAN figure out this computer thingy. ;)
From Genesis 42, we continue....So Joseph put his brother, Simeon, who was the most violent offender of the family if you follow his past in Genesis, into prison while the other family members returned to Jacob to feed their families and go get Benjamin to bring him to Joseph. (Love run-on sentences!) I bet the brothers felt pretty sheepish returning home, their heads hanging with conviction and probably some fear. But then, to make things worse, the money they had paid for the food they bought in Egypt was found inside their grain bags! Yes, every cent Joseph had hidden back in the brothers' grain bags to test their integrity once again. I bet the brothers were even more fearful and their accusing consciences immediately told them that this was an act of God.... that God must be punishing them for their evil ways (42:28,35). Then they had to explain everything to their father, Jacob. Not too fun for them...I can relate! Let's do a recap for them.....his precious son, Joseph, is "dead", they're starving, Simeon is in prison, and Benjamin is required to go to Egypt because the head-honcho of Egypt thinks Jacob's sons are spies AND they could all be charged with stealing because they did not pay for the grain they were given (or so they thought). Sucky deal! I'm sure Jacob was thrilled, especially since God had promised Jacob quite a bit of things in the past that looked very different than this present predicament (Gen 27). Sound familiar? Some things just run in the family!
Jacob first reacts with a "Everything is against me!!"(42:36) How many times have I said that!!! Then he questions the brothers wondering how this mysterious guard of Pharoah and his grain found out they had another brother. Little did Jacob know that God was orchestrating all of these events for a restoration beyond their wildest dreams!! Then grace came....ya remember Judah (the brother who has a dirty past from Genesis 38)? Well, he demonstrates some Christ-like character by telling Jacob that he will personally take Benjamin to Egypt and will be held responsible for any harm that comes to him. I'd say that's a pretty big change from Judah's past attitudes. This is where Jacob finally realizes there is no way around the situation, and instead of deciding to where sackcloth and ashes, Jacob shows where his help comes from and turns to the God of his ancestors....the God of Abraham and Isaac...it's a pretty desperate prayer (43:14). He also tells the brothers to put a double portion of money in the sacks to pay for the grain from their last trip and for the present trip. He gave them some nuts, honey, myrrh, balm and spices to try and appease the guard with whom they would have to present Benjamin. Then they headed to Egypt. The best part is, the brothers still have no idea that the head-honcho they are dealing with is their "dead" brother, Joseph! Sooooooo, applications....let me say I was blessed with what my mom wrote in last post's comments....about the audience of One. I know God is using this whole blogging thing to drill into me His promises and His faithfulness. It is mind-boggling to me that God allows some of the most stinky circumstances in our lives and our sins to positively impact us, our characters and our future generations. How could Jacob have known when he deceived his father, Isaac, regarding his birthright, that in the future, his very own sons would deceive him as well in the selling of his most precious son, Joseph, into slavery? And Joseph....how could he have possibly known when he was sold to the Ishmaelites that he would be the one that God would use to deliver his entire family from starvation and extinction so that a great and mighty nation could be born!? God, in His amazing grace allowed such suffering, deception, and sin to exist for a purpose....What Satan meant for damnation, God turned into the great joy of restoration and birthed a nation whose seed was our Lord Jesus! WOW! And the story isn't over yet, there is more suffering that is coming for this family.... thanks for reading and stay tuned for more!

Plenty, famine, and restoration....

You may be looking at this photo thinking, "What IS that and what does it have to do with the story of Joseph!?" Weeelllll, I have a nephew being born in a week and my brother and sister-in-law are naming him Benjamin. I painted this for him (Thanks, Sylvia for the watercolor pencils!) ....and it has a LOT to do with Joseph because we are approaching the part in Joseph's story where his brothers re-enter his life. Not only that, but the majority of their dealings together are around the youngest brother, Benjamin. AND, I thought it might be fun to put up a picture I did for once. ;p
So here we go.....
We left off with Joseph becoming 2nd in command over all of Egypt! Oh, how the tables have turned!!! God is faithful! And after 7 years of great crops and good weather, saving 1/5 of the crop and setting up storehouses all over Egypt, Joseph is finally opening up the storehouse doors to feed a very hungry Egypt. The seven years of famine have begun--watch how God uses this predicament to further bless Joseph's socks off!
So Joseph's dad, Jacob, is living in the land of Canaan with all the brothers......the famine has cramped their style, too, and so Jacob tells his sons (with the exception of Benjamin) to go to Egypt to buy some food for he had heard that there was an abundance there. (Gen. 42) Upon their arrival, they met a man named Zaphenath-Paneah, a well-dressed Egyptian representing Pharoah at the storehouse door. Can you guess who that was?? Yeah, Joseph. God's so cool. Yeah, so the brothers bowed low to the ground to show respect for Pharoah's second in command and I am sure by this point Joseph had his thirteen year-old dreams flood back to him...and Joseph says to them (recognizing them immediately) "Who are you and where are you from?" (as if he didn't know!) The brothers, not recognizing him, answered that they were from the land of Canaan, but Joseph wanting to know if his brothers had changed their evil ways said, "You are spies coming to see where our land is unprotected!" (Genesis 42:9) Can you imagine? I had to laugh at this! The brothers plead for their lives and claim that they are his servants, the sons of one man, Jacob, honest men with families of their own.....can you say, 'humbling experience'? Joseph says again, "no you are spies" and they say once again, "your servants were 12 brothers.....the youngest is at home in Canaan with our father and one other is no more" (nice cover, boys!) So Joseph once again calls them spies and says to them that the only way that he will believe they are innocent is if they send one of their brothers to go back to Canaan and return with the youngest brother.....the others must go off to prison. A little retribution action going on here, I'd say! But then after three days in prison, Joseph says to the brothers (Gen. 42:18+) that he will let all but one brother go back to Canaan to feed their starving families, but Simeon had to stay in prison until they returned with the youngest. Immediately the brothers (in their native tongue, not Arabic) mumble to each other that this whole situation is God punishing them for their sin 13 years ago with Joseph. Joseph must have been soooo relieved to hear his native tongue let alone these brothers show some remorse for "killing" him. I'll stop there for now. I find it interesting how Joseph tests his brothers to see if they are really honest men or if they still act in selfish self-fulfillment. And what about Benjamin? He is Joseph's flesh and blood, the last son of Jacob's beloved Rachel. Is he well and do the brothers loathe him as they did Joseph because of their father's favoritism? How will the brothers react when Joseph reveals his true identity? Well, that's still to come.....but what can we apply to our lives today....I think the fact that the brothers are FINALLY coming clean about the whole Joseph thing after 13 years just goes to show that God is a God of truth and reconciliation. AND before reconciliation, there must be confession and repentence. This is the journey that the brothers are on. God desire for them to be on this journey because He cares about them so much. He desires for a right relationship with their estranged brother as well as a right relationship with their father who still believes a beast killed Joseph. That should teach us (ME) that God never allows us to get away with sin. The truth will always come out and it DOES set us free if we allow it to. More on that point later. :) Stay tuned! And I have to be honest....if you (if there are people reading this blog) do not comment, then I never know when to write a new entry, so please comment so I know I should move on to the next portion of the story. Thanks for graciously reading my stuff.